Happiness is not a destination; each of us can create the conditions necessary to be happy.
Let us live in the present moment, in the here and now. The past no longer matters. We cannot change it, nor should we dwell on the idea that it was better or ruminate on what we could have done differently.
Nor should we become fixated on the future or on things we fear might happen, because they may never come to pass. We often live as if we were going to live forever, putting off actions and pleasures because we assume there will always be time later. We tell ourselves, "when I retire," "during my vacation," or "when I win the lottery." Meanwhile, the feelings and experiences of the present moment slip by unnoticed.
Let us, then, experience each moment as if it were our last, for every moment is unique and unrepeatable.
Our future is not written. A whole world of possibilities lies open before us. Imagine a book lying on the table before you. Open it and look inside. Its pages are blank, waiting for you to decide how you wish to live your life, make your own decisions, dream big, and strive to make those dreams a reality.
We write our own books, our own stories, and our own future. Nothing is genetically predetermined. We are the masters of our own destiny.
Let us dream of a better world!
The question we ask ourselves is: can we learn to live happily from childhood?
When we think of happy children, we think of happy parents. Bandura stated that "we learn through observation or imitation," making the modeling effect fundamental. As parents, we serve as role models for our children. Our values, attitudes, beliefs, and ways of understanding life all influence their growth.
The messages children receive are equally important. From a young age, they form their self concept, the image they hold of themselves. When parents repeatedly tell a child, "you are worthless" or "you won't amount to anything," those words can shape the way the child sees themselves and, eventually, the way they behave. A negative self concept can lead to low self esteem, while positive messages can provide children with a sense of security, calm, and confidence.
Freud's attachment theory offers an explanation: happier children who receive plenty of love and attention in their early years relate better to others and tend to be more assertive, communicative, and cooperative.
Educating with love is the key to children's happiness
No one teaches us how to love or how to live. It is a learning process that requires us to fall many times, learn to unlearn, and get back up again.
At school, however, children rarely receive instruction on emotional intelligence, self esteem, happiness, moral values, conflict resolution, communication, empathy, or learning to love others while embracing diversity.
It is essential to recognize our emotions, name them, and express them as assertively as possible. Voicing how we feel can relieve the burden we sometimes carry and can help us resolve problems with others. Expressing our feelings also helps us become happier.
Happiness grows when we share our joy through hugging, laughing, tickling, dancing, or singing. There are moments in life when words are unnecessary and emotions speak for themselves. Our pain and sadness lessen when we express what we feel, and shared sorrows become lighter when accompanied by silence, understanding, a hug, or clasped hands.
Learning curricular subjects is fundamental to a person's cultural growth and future. Yet no one teaches us how to be happy or how to relate to others. We ought to teach children to be happy by helping them accept that each of us is unique. Being different does not make us better or worse people. We simply are. Accepting our differences means accepting that others may not think or feel the way we do.
Others will not change if we ourselves are unwilling to change. We must learn to accept ourselves as we are and accept others unconditionally.
One of our greatest battles is trying to change others
We need to learn to value ourselves more and accept our mistakes. We are often very hard on ourselves, believing that our errors are enormous and that no one will forgive us for them. Yet failure is the best teacher. To achieve success, we must fail many times. We fall so that we can learn to get back up.
Learning to make mistakes and laugh at ourselves are essential lessons for adapting to change and becoming more flexible in our beliefs. I remember a boy who was unable to laugh at himself or with anyone else. His expression was blank, and he disliked laughing, dressing up, or playing certain games. He was always tense and rigid. It took a long time for him to learn to enjoy what he was doing.
It would be interesting to teach children in schools how to "act silly," to laugh at ourselves and enjoy the inner child within us.
Shyness and embarrassment often emerge during adolescence, and sometimes that feeling stays with us for the rest of our lives. We become constantly concerned with what others might think, telling ourselves, "They’ll think we’re crazy."
What if we were all a little crazy? What if we allowed our inner child to come out, unconcerned with the opinions of others, simply enjoying every moment? What if we sang, laughed, danced, and played?
Adults like to play too, and we learn better through play. We enjoy challenges and sharing games with others, whether competing or cooperating. Play fosters social connection, facilitates emotional expression, and nurtures creativity. It allows us to reconnect with our inner child, to be genuine, authentic, and true to ourselves.
Seeing the world through a child's eyes allows us to appreciate the beauty around us and marvel at ordinary moments as if seeing them for the first time: a sunrise or sunset, the blue of the ocean, the green of the mountains, the scent of wet earth, the sound of falling raindrops, or a new symphony waiting to be composed.
Moral values are universal; we are born with them, yet the age of twelve marks a crucial time when schools can help young people develop their moral reasoning. A youth lacking values can lead to a society that becomes more selfish, individualistic, competitive, and violent.
We are social and altruistic beings by nature. It is important to teach children that we are not born violent, but rather that violence is learned. To become less violent and avoid aggression, we must learn from childhood how to communicate effectively.
It is not only about what I say, but how I say it. We may know the words we want to use, yet struggle to express ourselves clearly or directly. Others may misunderstand us, especially when our words do not align with our gestures or facial expressions.
Our words must be accompanied by the manner in which we deliver them, because non verbal communication matters deeply. A message that comes from the heart reaches the hearts of others.
Communicating well is difficult, and speaking in a way that creates mutual understanding can be even harder. We tend to speak from a place of emotion, making it difficult to pause, breathe, reflect, and articulate exactly what we mean.
Conflict is easy to create. However, when we learn to manage our emotions, communicating with others and moving past conflict becomes easier. When we feel good about ourselves, our optimism shapes our ability to resolve problems in a healthier way.
Empathy is essential for resolving conflicts and for building happier relationships with others.
About the Author
Dr. Elena Baixauli is a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and a distinguished professional with 28 years of experience across psychology, mediation, sexology, conflict resolution, criminology, and mental health. She brings together academic depth, clinical experience and a strong commitment to human-centered conflict resolution and social impact.